Valentino Rossi, five time MotoGP world champion and all around wunderkind, has tested a 2008 Ferrari F1 car at Italy’s Mugello circuit. Although done with no intent of Rossi switching from two wheels to four, his times were good enough to impress Ferrari. Good enough, in fact, for Ferrari to issue a press release on the matter. How good? His best time of the day was two tenths of a second slower than Kimi Raikkonen’s record for the same circuit and car.
Two tenths of a second slower than the man who won the F1 championship in 2007. Two tenths of a second slower the first time he’d driven the car, with only hours of seat time. Damn.
I like Rossi, I really do, but anyone who can turn in world-class performances in two distinctly different motor sports is simply not human. We test other athletes for performance enhancing drugs; I think it’s about time that we started testing Rossi for green blood and funky internal organs. One of these days he’s going to pull off the helmet and the fake face is coming with it. If he’s part of our new lizard overlords, we’ve got no chance of beating them on the racetrack.