A contradiction if there ever was one: the Toyota Tacoma All Terrain Gamer. Contrary to what one might immediately conclude, the biggest design flaw here was assuming that any gamer enthusiastic enough to need three in-dash TV screens would ever be interested in something as physically taxing (and so full of sunshine! AUGH! IT BURNS!) as off-roading. The second mistake is harder to specify as the entire vehicle itself seems to be an exercise in questionable judgment – which doesn’t stop me from irrationally lusting after it.

True, all outward indicators suggest that it’s a bigger Microsoft-bred horror than their current operating system (which I use, because you insufferable Apple elitists don’t make the Mac any more attractive), but look! It has gullwing doors! It also has a green Plexiglas-covered TRD-tuned 304 horsepower 4.0-liter Supercharged engine, which Toyota claims (without a trace if irony) perfectly enables the adventurous gamer to traverse even the most rugged landscape. The rugged landscape where? Outside Mom’s basement?