Meet Colondra Hamilton, she’s the crack smoking, masturbating, tinted window driving Ohio resident that recently got nabbed for burning a little rubber while still inside the car. Imagine Ohio Officer Ross Gilbert’s reaction when he pulled over Colondra for tinted windows, but instead found that she was having her own one person party in the front seat. After mentally dousing his entire body with vinegar Officer Gilbert found that not only was Ms. Hamilton playing hide the pickle with an aftermarket appendage, but she also had an accomplice who was holding up a mood-movie playing laptop which apparently helped her embrace her true need for speed. When all was said and done Officer Gilbert charged Colondra with “driving with inappropriate alertness” and tinted windows and stated, “It’s very unusual,” he said. “This is a first for me.”
Yep, I’m sure it was Officer Gilbert… I’m sure it was.