You thought our find last week, the dry-lake torpedo with the plexiglass face, was horrifying … our gem today will simply make you dry heave with delight. You see, the lakester last week was designed to go fast. Today’s Comuta-Car was designed to be only slightly faster than walking, and far less convenient. The little electric car was less of a glorified golf cart (that would be heaping too much praise on it) and more like a little blister pack of death. It’s 6 HP GE electric motor could propel it to a top speed of 39 MPH, allowing any 8 year old girl on a Big Wheel to humiliate it downhill.
Today’s Implement of Destruction: Honda-Powered Comuta-Car
So we’ve established that the stock Comuta-Car was a plague upon American roadways, so how can we make this plague more infectious? First, let’s ditch the batteries and the ‘lectric motor for a proper mill. Honda 250? Sure, why the hell not. Mount it at a crazy angle right underneath your nether regions? Sounds like a great idea. Just don’t waste too much brainpower thinking about how poorly the conversion was done – you won’t live long enough to see anything fail. Don’t forget those metal teeth emerging from the front grill area! Lord, you wouldn’t want anyone to think you were just a NORMAL looney in a 8′ long electric doorstop!
Here’s our vision – you pony up for this and have someone capture a nice video of the last 14 minutes of your life as you flog the absolute crap out of that isosceles triangle with wheels. We’ll try not to giggle when the cooling-air-strangled Honda mill gives out with a bang, sending molten aluminum bearings right at the family jewels.
The best part about it is just imagining what the guy next to you at the stoplight is going to think when you waste him off the line in what looks to be Fred Flintstone’s Smart car. If you are still in one piece after a week or two, you’ll realize that the 250cc one-lung simply ain’t enough. Slap a Hayabusa motor in! We’ll make sure the estate relists whatever is left of the horrifying wreck back from whence it came … on eBay.