While last week’s cycle-fendered fois gras ratcheted up the Jerry Lewis factor to 11, it was as good as obese goose-liver pate compared to today’s nutcase creation. Join us as we examine another object of lust, fear, and revulsion – a combination not unlike every David Lynch film ever made, ESPECIALLY Blue Velvet. We only wish Dennis Hopper had driven this.
Today’s Implement of Destruction: the Watson 350
What has open wheels, a fuel-injected Chevy V8 blowing exhaust through baffled straight pipes, no roof or doors to speak of, and a Bruce-Springsteen-anthem-style patriotic paint job? Why, we’re glad you asked. Today’s “melt your face off with unadulterated 180 proof awesome” DEATH WISH Express is a replica of a 1964 Watson Indycar, and you can drive it on the street.
Oh yes, don’t let the gorgeous featherweight body, the incredible detail work, or the remarkable accuracy (aside from the engine and the street-legal bits) fool you. It is going to find a way to demolish itself with you inside, in a flaming ball of glory that’ll look to onlookers like the Hindenburg being blown up by a squadron of Death Stars commanded by Satan himself.
The legendary AJ Watson, regarded as the most successful of the many front-engined Indycar constructors, said of this particular car, “I have never built such a nice car. I have never worked on such a nice car. If we had it back then, we’d kick their asses!” Indeed. Maybe even incinerate said asses. With radness.
We’re hard pressed to think of a classier way to go out. This is a freakin’ STREET LEGAL INDYCAR. We don’t know what sort of deal with the Devil the dude who registered it made with the Indiana DMV, but we think it involves the souls of at least 52 innocent puppies and a lot of heavy metal. As always, we’re enraptured imagining our hypothetical cul-de-sac (we’ll call it Death Wish Court) loaded with horrified, HORRIFIED onlookers screaming with terror as you mash the throttle and disappear into a noxious cloud of burning rubber, magnesium, and flesh.
Wipe off the cold sweat with a towel, because next week we’ll have another nightmare for you to freak out about all over again. You can always get your morbid fix by perusing the DEATH WISH category here at Ridelust.
[Source: eVilBay Motors]