The Liguri Border Comb Route, known locally as the LGKS, is a former military road that winds along the Italian – French border in the southwest corner of Italy. Built as a military road, it’s original purpose was to support military installations strategically located along its 39 mile length. Today, the forts are abandoned and the LGKS serves as a mecca for off road enthusiasts on two and four wheels. The trail leaves little room for error, so it is not for the novice rider or driver as the above video illustrates. More vids after the jump:

As you’d expect, the Ligurian Alps are also crossed by hiking trails. What do you do when you’ve ridden the Liguri Border Comb Route a few hundred times and are in need of a new challenge? Why, ride the hiking trails, of course!

If the first video gave you vertigo, don’t even think about watching the next two. On the other hand, if you want to admire some spectacular scenery and watch some unbelievable off-road riding skills in action, take a look at the vids below. Besides, it’s Monday – you really didn’t think you were going to be productive today, did you?

Stelvio Pass

You say “dangerous”, I say “fun”. Maybe it was the good fortune of spending my formative driving and riding years strafing the canyons around Boulder, Colorado, but I can’t help getting worked up over mountain roads with plenty of switchbacks, blind corners and decreasing radius turns. I may prefer asphalt to dirt, but I’m no stranger to Jeep trails in the Rockies, either. I’ve learned the hard way why you never wash the mud from a rental Toyota 4Runner that you used to explore the Switzerland Trail (unless you really really like trying to buff out brush pinstriping).

This ARTICLE, posted on Waze, gives their take on the 19 most complex and dangerous roads in the world. Some are just interchanges; complex, but not particularly worthy as a vacation destination. Others may offer drama or sheer terror, but at such low speeds that it’s not worth the effort to get to them. Here’s my take on the best six and how I’d like to enjoy them:

Col de Turini

KTM 990 SM

Col de Turini, France – featured in Top Gear series 10 as one of the most exciting roads on the planet, Col de Turini is part of the WRC Monte Carlo Rally. My choice for the best way to enjoy it? I’ll take a KTM 990 Supermoto R, please.

Stelvio Pass

Ariel Atom

Stelvio Pass, Italy – located in the Eastern Alps just below the Austrian border, the pass is the second highest paved road in the Alps. The amazing views make this a popular destination for motorcycle tours and magazine shoots. My ride for this one? An Ariel Atom, please.

Trollstigen - The Troll's Ladder

BMW R1100S

Trollstigen, Norway – narrow and steep, this road (translated as “Troll’s Ladder) winds though one of Norway’s many fjords. Given the road’s popularity with tourists, I’d like a bike on this on. My old BMW R1100S will do nicely, thank you.

Los Caracoles

Ford RS200 Evolution

Los Caracoles Pass, Chile to Argentina – despite its steep inclines, annual snowfall, switchback corners and heavy commercial vehicle traffic, this road has a good safety record. To be on the safe side, I’d like something with AWD and lots of power for this one. Not too big, not too small, either. Make it a Ford RS200 Evolution.

Iroha-zaka

Nissan Skyline GT-R

Iroha-zaka, Japan – connecting Nikko and Oku-Nikko, the Iroha-zaka actually consists of two routes; one is used for descending, the other for ascending. Like most things Japanese, the road is steeeped in tradition; to honor this, make my ride a Skyline GT-R. Surprise me on the vintage.

Lysebotn Road

BMW 135i

Lysebotn Road, Norway – billed as “the most fun you can have on four wheels”, Lysebotn Road is also considered one of the most scenic spots in all of Europe. Since I opted for a bike on my last Norwegian pass, I’ll take a car this time – make it a BMW 135.

If you can’t afford the airfare and rental fees for these six, let’s not forget that there can be some spectacular drives closer to home. Let’s hear about your favorites.

Did you know that, in the United States, some luckless motorist slams into an unwitting Bambi every 26 seconds? That adds up to more than a million incidents a year … the roads are running red with the blood of cute, innocent woodland animals. Worst of all, the average cost of such an accident is now over $3,000 … What’s going on? Our tin-foil hat theory: Al Qaeda agents have infiltrated our national forests and are hell-bent on destroying our decadent infidel way of life by tossing wildlife at our indulgent BMWs. For the skeptics, click through for more.

Despite our sardonic tone, deer collisions are a real (and at several grand a pop, an expensive) and growing (up 18.3% from last year, even though vehicles on the road have only increased by 7%) problem. State Farm commissioned the study to track the issue, and they attribute the increased prevalence of deer-vs-car incidents to “The combination of growing deer populations and the displacement of deer habitat caused by urban sprawl are producing increasingly hazardous conditions for motorists and deer.” This seems to be the largest problem in West Virginia and Michigan, who top the list of problem states. At least the upshot to the whole problem is a reliable source of “free-range” venison. Just don’t tell PETA about it.

Press Release

Deer-Vehicle Collision Frequency Jumps 18 Percent in Five Years

— If a deer collision seems inevitable, attempting to swerve out of the
way could cause you to lose control of your vehicle or place you in
the path of an oncoming vehicle.

The U.S. Department of Transportation just doled out $100,000 to upstart company Solar Roadways to develop “Solar roads,” i.e. sturdy, 12×12 solar panels built specifically to be embedded into roads. The Department of Energy and, of course, Solar Roadways hopes that these solar roadways will push quite a bit of power into the energy grid. Each panel can develop around 7.6 kwh of power per day. The panels may also be include heating elements to keep the road from freezing over and glowing LED road markings to help people finally act out TRON based fantasies in the real world. For a mere $7k per panel!

According to Popular Science a mile-long stretch of four-lane solar road could produce enough energy to power 500 homes. The Solar Roadways press release includes even more potential awesomeness. They say electric vehicles will be able to recharge on the road and in parking lots making long distance travel in fully electric cars a lot more viable. They also claim the roads will be able to detect crossing animals and warn travelers to slow down.

Solar Roadways estimates it will take about $5 billion to cover all of the asphalt surfaces in the U.S. but, that it would produce “three times more power than we’ve ever used as a nation — almost enough to power the entire world.” Can you say stimulus package?

Have traffic deaths increased drastically with higher speed limits? That’s what a new study would like you to believe with its incredible-sounding conclusions: 12,545 deaths are attributable to higher speed limits! Sounds like lowering speed limits would save lives, right? Wrong. The study looked at the years 1995-2005, and didn’t look at any recent data. So what does the recent data show? Contrary to what the first study would have you believe, traffic deaths are at their lowest levels since the early 1960s. Lower speeds would save more lives, but so would not driving at all. Click through for more analysis.

Why are we confident that one is more correct than the other? Well, the current statistics that show a reduction in traffic deaths are from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, not historically a friend of higher speed limits. Who released the other study? The School of Public Health at the University of Illinois, who are smart and well-intentioned people who sought to prove the narrow point that reduced speeds statistically lead to fewer deaths. That is true, but reflects a reality on paper, not actual current conditions. Their conclusions were based on old data, and showed a trend that is contradicted by the current data.

The bottom line? The study reads like a drastic call to reduce speeds to save lives, but increasing vehicle safety due to better safety equipment since 2005 and other current trends mean the old study is obsolete. The US is on track to have less than 30,000 traffic fatalities this year … still a huge number, but way down from the 37,261 who died last year … and that was the lowest fatality rate since 1961. Not sure who to believe? Read both articles and draw your own conclusions. And drive safely!

[Sources: Autoblog and AP]

Sixty-seven year old Charlie Bruener and his wife Donna were driving down US-27 in Alexandria, Kentucky, when they say they were cut off by 82 year old Beecher Davis. Unfortunately for the Bruener’s, they would soon find out that Mr. Davis is the most ornery old man in the great state of Kentucky.

According to the Charlie Bruener, Mr. Davis followed them down US-27 until they pulled over in a Walmart parking lot, at which point Mrs. Bruener called 911. Mr. Davis then revealed his well earned title of “Most Ornery Octogenarian in Kentucky” by getting out of his van and approaching the Bruener’s car huffing and puffing mightily.

Read on for the conclusion:


Ornery B sez: “If you call me a SOB., I’ll slug you, too.”

Mr. Bruener then said “Get away from here you SOB“, at which point Beecher “Ornery B*” Davis punched Mr. Bruener in the jaw. Squarely. In a interesting turn of events, the punch-ee, Mr. Bruener, reached for his Derringer pistol (for which he has a concealed carry permit), but the King of all that is Ornery was, naturally, unphased.

“He told me to shoot him! He pointed it right at his chest and he said shoot me! I said Mister I will shoot you if you don’t get away from me.” said Bruener. “I said get away from me you SOB nut you know like that and then I get hit again in the chin! He hit me again in the chin!” Indeed. That’s how it happened. Really.

Police arrived and booked Ornery B into the Campbell County jail on an assault charge. He was later released on bond. According to the police report, officers asked Davis why he approached Bruener’s car instead of just calling the police. Davis told officers he doesn’t like being called an SOB. His direct quote to the police officer asking the questions…
“If you call me a SOB, I’ll slug you, too.”

*note: nickname bestowed by the Ridelust staff. Not Mr. Davis’ real nickname. Well, now it is.

There have been a good number of motorcycle awareness commercials in the past. They usually rely on the shock value of some couple in a car making a turn when motorcycle crashes into them. This one is different. It has lines. It reminds me of Kraftwerk. Remember them?

Police in Britain’s Greater Manchester area are using a sophisticated, and obviously overpriced, new weapon in the never ending battle against average citizens… the CCTV-Equipped Smart car. The Smart car has a 12 foot mast with a camera on top, along with a computer that records everything it sees, digitally. No longer will the filthy criminal get away with such anti-social behavior as “adjusting the radio” or “combing their hair” without the unblinking eye of THE MAN seeing it; and of course, billing you for it. Because that’s the whole point of these systems, revenue collection. They see a driver with one hand off the wheel, they send said driver a ticket, which said driver will pay because he’s a polite Englishman who stutters charmingly. They all do that, it’s part of their genetic predisposition towards social awkwardness. They all have that too.

They’re all also completely dead on the inside from living in a country with 4.2 million CCTV cameras, and where they force themselves to put on a show of unnatural politeness 24 hours a day lest the infinite watching cameramen catch them doing anything close to antisocial behavior; or a bit of the old ultraviolence.

That entire country is walking around in such a daze of fear and phony cheerfulness that they don’t even realize how completely absurd their country looks to the rest of the world. Privacy International rates Britain along with China and Malaysia in terms of protecting individual privacy. It’s ranked as the worst Western democracy in the world in that regard. And now they have roving cameracars focused on catching drivers who are adjusting their radios?

It’s time to take a cricket bat to those cameras. And don’t forget to Digg us:

Apparently, not only can the free market help ease congestion on the roads, but its proving to be a more efficient way to repair them as well. Fast-food chain KFC recently offered to fill the potholes of various cities for free, as long as they get to stencil a non-permanent logo over the patch that says “Re-Freshed by KFC.”

This is another perfect example of the free market working to fix problems that most people think only government can solve. The market constantly evolves new and interesting ways to solve problems, as evidenced by KFC’s pothole plan. If their plan is accepted by enough cities, other companies will want in on the action too. Private companies may start taking over all sorts of public goods problems.

This is an elegant way to solve an apparently tough public goods problem. Many major cities have serious problems with potholes. Now, instead of passing that problem off to government workers, who have no incentive to get quality work done quickly and efficiently; the free market has a way to let private business take some of the workload. Private companies have an incentive to be quick, efficient, and to produce quality work, since their logo will be associated with the patch. All of that, plus at zero cost to private citizens.

But sadly, Chicago’s city officials had a typically “governmental” view of the plan… Brian Steele, a spokesman for the Chicago Department of Transportation, said “We don’t allow any type of printing or advertising placed on a city street or sidewalk.”

Let’s hope other cities have a more enlightened view of the situation.

KFC.com

As we mentioned during the introduction to our beginner’s course, Road Rage 101: How To Piss Off Other Drivers, poor driving isn’t an obvious side effect of limited cerebral capacity, but rather the result of countless hours of feverish, committed practice. Although drivers in places like New Jersey make it look effortless, the fact remains that dangerous, often illegal driving habits require fastidious dedication to the craft, and we here at RideLust are determined to help. To begin, you must first honestly asses your personal ability. If you feel as though you’ve successfully mastered all of the lessons outlined in Road Rage 101, or you have at least 5 years experience regularly commuting in the Tri-State area, you might be ready to graduate to an intermediate level of douchebaggery. However, be forewarned: the upper tier of jackassedness is an elite circle open only to those who have demonstrated an unfailing dedication to inciting blind road rage. If you still feel truly prepared to assume the responsibility of serving as an ambassador of the asinine, please proceed to study the advanced tactics we’ve outlined below.

1. Always Use Fog Lights

An extension of Road Rage 101, Section 8, the core principle you need to remember here is: “The brighter, the better.” HID headlights are merely a stepping stone into the world of irritating driving habits, and just because your Xenon’s are so bright they’ve triggered epileptic seizures doesn’t mean you’ve achieved your full jerk potential. A more aggressive tactical maneuver than simple HID’s, fog lights elevate jerkdom to a whole new level – provided you don’t get caught up in any of the “technical” issues, of course. Sure, some might say that “fog” lights should only be used to cut through a dense, engulfing “fog,” but why wait for inclement weather? You probably dropped a pretty big chunk of change on your sweet set up, and what’s the point of having it if you can’t use it? The second that sun slips below the horizon, you should be lighting those bad boys up like it’s 1964 and you’re patrolling Saigon for Vietcong insurgency. If you find that your OEM fog lights aren’t enough to illuminate every crevice of the Earth, consider investing in a high-density aftermarket roof-mounted lightbar. Remember: if your lights aren’t capable of guiding a shipping barge safely into port, you just aren’t trying hard enough.

2. Ride The Brake

When you find yourself mired in heavy stop-and-go traffic, don’t be afraid to share your frustration with your fellow motorists. Any opening you get with at least 15 feet of unobstructed asphalt, throw it into 3rd gear as fast as you can before downshifting like a madman and coming to a screeching halt three-hundredths of a second later. Once traffic begins to creep forward again, instead of coasting slowly in line as you wait to move through the congestion, continue driving as though you are Dale Earnhardt Jr. waiting for the caution to lift. Keep moving forward with sudden great bursts of speed, and make sure your abrupt acceleration has tricked at least two drivers behind you into thinking the flow has finally picked up before you slam violently on the brake pedal again. If you’re feeling up to the task, you might even try complimenting your larger, convulsive movements with several smaller, spasmodic brake taps. To put it simply: think of your braking system as a primitive sort of telegraph and your taillights as Morse code, use them to send urgent messages of distress to all surrounding motorists.

3. Do Not Pass

Remember those days as a child when a mid-summer storm forced you and your friends to stay indoors and play? Do you remember that game you invented where you pretended the floor was molten hot lava and you would jump around on the furniture and tables to avoid touching it? Do you remember how your mother would occasionally come out of the bedroom and shout at you to knock it off while she fixed herself another Bloody Mary? No? Alright well nevertheless, those rules you learned as a kid playing the Lava Game can be applied in your adulthood, just swap the floor of your house for the left lane on the interstate. If you find yourself in the right-hand lane behind a driver travelling much too slow for your liking, do not speed up to pass him on the left. Instead, creep so far up on his bumper that you can see his five o’clock shadow and glare pointedly at him, perhaps throwing in a few obscenities if you’re feeling adventurous. Even if he refuses to respond by speeding up, do not relent because this – this lane right here – this is your lane, and you’re not giving up an inch of it come hell or high water.

4. Hog The Road

When attempting to make a left-hand turn from a single-lane road, do not hug the center line to allow motorists behind you to navigate around. Instead, stop as close to the perfect center of the road as physically possible in order to ensure that all traffic behind you must remain at a dead stop until you move. If you’re feeling really punchy, occasionally jut forward suddenly as if preparing to dart across before suddenly stopping again, delicately lacing the frustration you’re causing with little bits of false, fleeting hope.

5. Insist On Yielding, ALWAYS

General law dictates that at a junction where two or more intersections are controlled by a stop sign, the driver on the right has the right of way. At smaller intersections or when less cars are involved, the driver who arrives and stops first has the right of way. Regardless of the law, however, your sole mission is to be as charitable and accommodating as possible, ideally to the point of causing chaos. When you are the first of 2 or more cars to arrive at a multi-directional stop, instead of proceeding ahead of the other motorists as traffic law would dictate, insist on waving everyone through first. If the other drivers hesitate or otherwise appear confused by your action, begin to gesticulate more aggressively, indicating impatience with their unwillingness to accept your benevolence.

6. Refuse To Make A Left-Hand Turn Until The Second Coming Of The Christ

This is an especially useful tactic when driving during rush hour or other peak travel times. When attempting to make a left turn which requires you to yield to oncoming traffic, instead of creeping slowly into the intersection to capitalize on any breaks in traffic, remain firmly stopped behind the white line. Do not even entertain the idea of removing your foot from the brake until the nearest oncoming vehicle is at least 3 geographical miles away.

7. Fear The Police

Note: This is actually more of a group effort as it requires the participation of several motorists in order to be effective. Even if you have a relatively clean driving record with no illicit substances in your glove compartment, you should immediately panic whenever you see a police cruiser travelling on the road. Rather than proceed as normal, when you notice a cop casually driving on the road, immediately slam on your brakes to make sure you leave a solid 50-yard cushion between you and him. Additionally, if the officer is in the right hand lane and you are well within the speed limit preparing to overtake him on the left, respond immediately by slowing to a crawl and – this is important – do not change lanes. Altering your lane position could draw unnecessary attention to you, so remain firmly ensconced within the passing lane doing about 10-20 mph below the posted speed limit. Remember: regardless of whatever sound logic or reason may dictate, that officer isn’t concerned about bank robbers, drug dealers, child molesters, or murderers – his number one priority is writing you a ticket.

8. Ignore The 3 Second Rule

Some so-called “experts” claim that you should follow the 3 Second Rule in order to maintain a safe following distance between you and other motorists. According to the rule, you should pick a fixed object somewhere on the road and after the car in front of you passes it, begin counting “one one thousand, two one thousand, three one thousand.” If you reach three-one-thousand before passing the fixed object, you supposedly have an acceptable “safety cushion” between you and the car ahead. What one driver sees as a “safety cushion,” however, you should see as an “opportunity.” Three seconds worth of distance is way more than enough space to dart in and out of, especially if you’re driving something like a Honda CRX or Toyota Celica that was specifically built for precision asshole handling. If you’ve got a couple friends who want to try their hand at bursting safety bubbles too, you might consider going for the big game: the semi-truck. Due to their enormous size and slower response time, semi-truck’s usually leave pretty large safety gaps and while it might seem like an ambitious undertaking, a truly committed douchenozzle should be able to squeeze 3, maybe even 4 cars into that gap before it closes.

9. Do Not Merge Until The Last Possible Moment

When a sign reads “Lane Ends, Merge Right/Left,” the unwritten subtext is “…but only after gunning it to the very end of the lane.” See although you aren’t a firefighter, police officer, or any other sort of vital emergency personnel, wherever you have to be is much more important than wherever anyone else has to be. You just simply cannot be expected to “wait around” and “seamlessly merge with traffic” like every other Tom, Dick, and Harry – you’re important, dammit. Of course, it might seem unfair that you have to exhaust so much effort to constantly remind others of this, but that’s just one of the unfortunate burdens you must bear as an accomplished asswipe.

10. Drive Like A Teenager

In our beginner’s guide, we suggested one way to encompass all the points covered in the lesson was to simply drive like a woman. While this might work for your more elementary driving tactics, in order to truly embody the scourge of the driving earth, one must attempt to duplicate the habits of the most highly skilled demographic, the masters of the craft themselves: teenagers. Thanks to the incredibly efficient folks at the Department of Motor Vehicles, teenagers are granted permission to operate 3,000 lb machinery at speeds in excess of 50 mph after simply coloring in a couple of traffic signs and completing a few quick Driver’s Ed sessions with an enthusiastic, attentive government instructor. Although proven to be a flawless system, about once every few weeks a couple hundred bad seeds slip through the cracks and are unleashed onto the roads. Like a cheetah bounding gracefully across the planes of the Serengeti, the sight of a teenager navigating through traffic will leave you speechless with amazement, right before it kills you in a bloody, violent mess.

So remember, if you want to deliver the most intimidating, fearsome presence on the road as possible while simultaneously inciting a blind rage in your fellow drivers, forgo grill-mounted flame throwers or keying cars in parking lots and elect instead to simply drive like a teenager. If repeatedly practiced correctly over a 2-3 month period, you will eventually reach that elusive pinnacle of success and receive the ultimate honor: multiple death threats.

Godspeed, ye elite few.