Decorated rally racer and DC Shoe co-founder Ken Block, one of Subaru’s most valuable assets in catapulting them to the height of their popularity, is now working for Ford. Famous for his stunning X-Games performances and Gymkhana viral videos (featured after the jump), Block’s legacy within the motorsports circuit is well known by even the most casual of fans and Ford has essentially landed themselves the golden marketing ticket.

Beyond the scores of devout broskies that worship in his wake, Block will also bring to Ford the street cred of a second-generation fanboy. “I am stoked to be rallying in a Ford. They are an impressive force in the sport,” said Ken Block. “From the days of the 1970s Escorts to the Group B RS200 to the modern-day Focus and now the Fiesta, Ford just does an excellent job at rally and I couldn’t be happier to now be part of this amazing heritage. Not to mention my dad would be proud. He was a dedicated Ford guy.”

Equally excited is Ford, who has gained another invaluable asset in promoting the highly-anticipated rally-bred Fiesta. “Ken Block has established himself as an action sports competitor and a rising star in the world of American rally racing,” said Jamie Allison, director Ford North America Motorsports. “We are excited to have him on our team to help promote our new global products, the 2011 Ford Fiesta and 2012 Ford Focus.”

Block’s first rally appearance with Team Ford will be in the 2010 FIA World Rally Cup Championship, full-length coverage of which will be available from Discovery Channel HD. For those of you broke bastards who aren’t about to spend $50 extra for the premium cable package, WRC TV also provides live (FREE) coverage at WRC.com.

Check out Ken Block in action

Source: PRNewswire

Confirming the suspicions harbored by many automotive journalists that the vast majority of the car-buying public has zero interest in vehicles that are actually fun to drive, the Toyota Camry has earned the top spot as the best selling car of December 2009. As if that fact itself were not discouraging enough to end the year on, the even less impressive Toyota Corolla managed to snag the Number 2 spot, followed closely by the Honda Accord (3rd), Honda Civic (4th), and finally, the Chevy Malibu (5th). The singular reason for this, at least by our good friend Timothy Cain’s analysis, appears to be that many consumers value basic functions over frivolous things such as “performance” and “aesthetics.” This would explain the quasi-success of the PT Cruiser.

Surprisingly absent from the elite 5 was the Ford Fusion, which is perhaps the only vehicle outside of a Subaru lot that enjoyed a successful run in 2009. Another notable exclusion was the 2009 & 2010 MY BMW 328i, which despite the brutal recession has been spotted in overabundance in the fetid armpit alternatively known as “New Jersey.” With no rational explanation for this anomaly, RideLust is forced to conclude that we are living in the end times. We hope this scores us mad page hits from those Nostradamus nutjobs.

Source: GoodCarBadCar

Despite RideLust’s blatant and ardent affection for Volvo, it is with solemn respect that this grim story is approached. I jest, of course.

As many are well aware, Saab’s dysfunctional, 21-year relationship with General Motors has taken an even more tumultuous turn as of late thanks to Koenigsegg’s abrupt resignation from the purchase procedure and The General’s subsequent decision to wind down operations. Since GM’s announcement that Saab would be grounded for eternity (aviation reference, get it? No? Philistines), Dutch supercar maker Spyker has expressed a renewed interest in acquiring the brand and is currently GM’s preferred bidder, but the future still looks bleak. For some undisclosed reason, GM has managed to sour literally every potential sale that they’ve entertained and at this point, Saab is about as likely to escape their death sentence as Ed Whitacre is to grow a pair of large, supple breasts.

In protest of this eventuality, Saab owners across the globe were called to rally in front of GM’s headquarters in Detroit in a show of support for the ailing Swedish subsidiary. The result was mediocre at best. Based purely on reports and the handful of rather depressing photos, a total of maybe 30 Saab fans turned out to show their support, indicating that many owners have taken a page from Volvo loyalists’ book and already come to terms with the unpleasant reality.

Spyker is expected to formally submit their bid by Friday, January 7, 2010, and as per tradition, Saab will likely be dead by the following week. On the bright side, this means Geely has less competition for their Volvo-badged crap traps.

Source: Boston Globe
Image cred: AP Photo

Good news for all the expectant fanboys at the local VFW: the 2011 Cadillac CTS-V Coupe has finally made its first appearance. Scheduled to officially debut next week at the 2010 North American International Auto Show, the high performance (though slightly chunky) coupe promises to pose a serious threat to the high-output warhorses currently thundering out of Germany. While the Caddy of legends told might have enjoyed limited popularity outside of bingo halls and Def Jam, the CTS-V coupe is a beast unlike any other. Despite the fact that GM’s corporate philosophy as a whole may leave a lot to be desired, even we – the consummate, caustic professionals – here at RideLust can’t deny a superbly engineered vehicle when we see one.

The press release assures us that the interior is stocked with enough luxury amenities to appease even the most discerning elderly playboy, but with no studio photos to validate that assertion you’ll just have to take their word for it. Fortunately, the CTS-V’s biggest selling point has little to do with the new optional Saffron interior but rather the massive LSA 6.2L supercharged V-8 engine beneath the hood. Surprisingly enough, although many (including us) would have pegged the CTS-V’s immediate competition as the likes of such track-bred monsters like the M3, but the CTS-V’s 556-horsepower makes the M3′s 414-hp look like a Kozy Koupe. Thus, it is with great remorse that RideLust offers a sincere “I’m sorry” to Detroit and a heartfelt “Seriously?” to Munich.

The Red Green Show officially went off the air in 2006, but the indelible legacy it left on DIY gearheads lives on and to this day, duct tape is second only to Bondo as the destitute crowd’s favorite repair tool. Among those most heavily influenced by Red Green’s jury rigging is a member of RideLust’s own staff (who shall remain nameless) that attempted a half-assed repair job of their own on an aging Volvo. Hilarity later ensued at the inspection station (followed immediately by a rejection sticker) and in honor of the laughs they elicited we’ve assembled an assortment of our favorite moments in Possum Lodge engineering.

For those of you elitists with things like a “steady job” and “benefits,” you probably received a hefty Christmas bonus with your paycheck last month. The wisest move would be to invest it, but ask yourself this: can a high-yield savings account scale a vertical wall? Of course not, which means your most logical course of action would be to scour eBay high and low for the most impractical (and possibly by that very quality, totally badass) purchase. Since it was an excruciatingly slow news day, I took the liberty of doing it for you.

Available for a cool $40,900, this 1997 Hummer H1 is in excellent condition with only 7,600 miles on the odometer, indicating the previous owner was either a professional athlete, a rapper, or an exorbitantly wealthy soccer mom. The engine is 6.5L V8 turbo diesel that churns out 195 horsepower, which makes it perfectly suited for all the rock crawling it won’t be doing as it sits in your garage in your gated community. For those days when you want to feel the wind in your hair plugs, this particular H1 also comes with a fully detachable roof and enough interior seating for at least four ladies of ill repute.

On the off chance that you plan on buying it and using it for the purpose for which it was intended, it also comes with all that off-roading crap the Jeep fanboys ramble about. Just go read the listing or something.

Source: eBay Motors

Although some might reasonably argue that its bloated proportions cause it to lag significantly behind the competition (literally), the Dodge Challenger nevertheless continues to be a favorite amongst nostalgic muscle car enthusiasts and/or balding guys with a slight paunch. Since the part of that demographic that isn’t blowing their disposable income on alimony would gladly shell out hundreds of thousands of dollars to recapture the glory days of their youth, Mopar has released yet another aftermarket package for the Challenger.

The newest offering is dubbed the “Performance Appearance” Package, which achieves the same thing for the Challenger that a hairpiece does for its driver. Available in two parts, the exterior package includes body-color hood with scoop, body-color rear “Go-Wing” spoiler and strobe stripe performance graphics, while the interior package features a Mopar-branded T-handle shifter, bright pedal kit (automatic only), bright door-sill guards, premium carpet floor mats and a full vehicle cover. Prices begin at $1,995 and $945 (respectively) and do not include the ill-fitting Ed Hardy tee or the Journey’s Greatest Hits CD.

After Koenigsegg’s bid for Saab fell through and General Motors announced their ailing Swedish subsidiary would begin winding down operations in January, Dutch supercar maker Spyker once again prepared a bid for the brand. Rejected twice during preliminary negotiations for failing to agree to perform thrice weekly fellatio, or something equally as absurd, Spyker now appears to be topping the General’s list of preferred bidders. By Friday, a formal offer is expected to be filed that, in keeping with their apparent custom, GM will proceed to blow.

Check back later for official updates, or don’t. You could probably write the story yourself at this point.

Bonus round: how many phallic references were made in this article? Could there have been more? Discuss.

Source: Reuters

In a desperate attempt to maintain some sort of enthusiasm for perhaps the most over-hyped vehicle since the 2010 Camaro, Chevrolet’s marketing department assembled a rag tag group of dancers to perform what appears to be an epileptic fit. While the dance/cheer/cluster successfully accomplished Chevy’s larger objective of bringing the Volt to the forefront of popular conversation, it also garnered a fair amount of criticism for brilliant lyrics such as “…V for Chevy Volt you see, it’s so simple like a dimple, plug it in and see.”

Unfortunately, contrary to what one would logically assume, the marketing team responsible for this gem was not under the influence of any illicit substances and was subsequently mildly offended by the negative feedback. According to a story published by the Detroit News this morning, Chevy claims the Volt Dance was never intended to appeal to the audience of automotive press professionals or adult car buyers, but rather to the children.

Apparently, Chevy reached the (correct) conclusion that those members of society capable of processing complex abstract thought lost interest in the Volt months ago, and the only remaining marketing group still susceptible to the gimmick would be children. So, given that the bar was set pretty low to begin with, Chevy is chalking the entire disaster up to a quasi-success and will continue their quest to appeal exclusively to middle schoolers – presumably because said group will likely be in their mid-20′s by the time the Volt reaches production.

Source: DetNews

As a bittersweet farewell to one of the most tumultuous years in automotive history, RideLust presents to you a re-cap of all the biggest industry events in 2009…and a few that slipped in under editorial bias.

Rick Wagoner, Bob Nardelli, and Alan Mulally spent weeks feigning humility and destitution in three piece Brooks Brothers suits in an attempt to wrangle a billion-dollar loan from an apparently benevolent Uncle Sam. Eventually, the government acquiesced and agreed to bail out both General Motors and Chrysler so as not to interrupt their steady production of poorly built, aesthetically unappealing vehicles.

Stunt double Ben Collins outed himself as Top Gear’s infamous masked driver, The Stig, potentially blowing the sweetest gig on planet Earth. Rather than kill him off, Top Gear attempted to counter the rumors by fingering (::snicker::) legendary racer Michael Schumacher as The Stig. Gearheads in America with an Internet connection that’s too slow to cope with downloading the weekly BBC broadcast still don’t give a rat’s ass.

There was some sort of F1 scandal involving Renault intentionally throwing the Singapore Gran Prix, but we were too immersed in our rally obsession to care. Just Google it or something.

As per their plan to cut costs and pretend to pay back taxpayers, GM made the logical decision to axe one of the only remaining brands that consumers still cared about, Pontiac. Shortly after the announcement, rumors began to circulate that the late John DeLorean’s company was interested in purchasing the rights to produce the Pontiac Solstice. The idea, much like the DMC-12, was short lived.

Drawing heavily from the blatantly phallic styling of the Ambiguously Gay Duo’s car, Porsche released it’s first 4-door sedan, the Panamera.

For what feels like the 10th year in a row, GM failed to launch the all-electric Chevy Volt. Reports indicate all 3 enthusiastic fans are coping well.

In an attempt to steal the allegedly sizable fan base the ever-elusive Volt has garnered, Nissan unveiled their equally unready-for-production EV, the Nissan LEAF. As quickly became the case with the Volt, no one really cares.

After muscling a disgraced Rick Wagoner from his position, GM CEO Fritz Henderson found himself on the receiving end of a nasty blow from karma when he was unexpectedly forced to resign after less than a year of service. Immediately following the announcement, his 20-something daughter Sarah Henderson took to Facebook, providing days of gossip fodder with her caps-locked, obscenity-filled defense of her father’s unremarkable stint with The General.

Although arguably destined to be a success in the long run, Cash For Clunkers proved treacherous to September car sales and dealer temperaments everywhere. In truly bureaucratic fashion, hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of dealer rebates were caught up in red tape for much longer than expected and, thanks to a gross ignorance of performance and quality, at least one 300ZX was clunked in favor of a 2010 Chrysler Sebring. It was a very dark time for the automotive community.

Citing the worsening global economy and the need for budget cutbacks, Toyota withdrew participation from F1, cruelly crushing the vain hope of fanboys everywhere that Toyota’s race-bred technology would eventually find its way into their excruciatingly boring production vehicles.

In a stark break with the Detroit Three’s storied business philosophy, Ford began producing cars that people actually enjoy driving. In one of the biggest upsets of the year, the 2010 Ford Fusion Hybrid all but completely usurped the Prius as the public’s favorite hybrid.

After failing to resolve some sort of vague disagreement with Penske, GM opted to wind down the Saturn brand, finally putting an end to what was basically a 19-year identity crisis.

Unseating Ford as the reigning king of the recall, Toyota found itself in hot water in the latter half of the year when a grisly accident exposed serious engineering flaws. After feebly attempting to pin the problem of sudden, accidental acceleration on loose floor mats and receiving a class action lawsuit by way of response, Toyota demonstrated a rare act of responsibility for their subpar product by recalling 3.8 million vehicles for faulty accelerators. Of course, although this was certainly a serious problem in urgent need of an immediate resolution, some might reasonably argue that anyone who purchased a Toyota sort of deserved it anyway.

Ford went to great lengths to keep its month-long negotiations with Geely a secret, ultimately culminating in the quiet sale of Volvo in mid-December. Fortunately, traditional Volvo enthusiasts renounced their brand loyalty when the company was purchased by Ford in 1999, so few tears were shed.

Finally, just a few days before Christmas GM delivered a heartfelt gift to Sweden, announcing that purchase negotiations with Koenigsegg had fallen through and Saab would be killed off. The failure trifecta is now complete.

In conclusion, on behalf of the staff that I no longer employ, I’d like to wish the RideLust readership a very Happy New Year. Thank you sincerely for reading and please keep up the snarling hate mail, my therapist loves the business.