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10 Funniest Personalized Plate Fails

Posted in Bizarre by Julian | July 20th, 2010 | 39 Responses |

Vanity plates are the tools that help you to stand out from the crowd. No sorry, that should read, are FOR tools who want to stand out from the crowd. Pay money to adorn your piece-of-junk automobile with an inspiringly un-amusing slogan or mildly rude phrase? Sounds like a one-way ticket to douchebag stardom… And if you’re so moronic you lack the brainpower to even think up a suitably cheesy or lame slogan for your plate, why don’t you shamelessly rip-off the following classic ‘bag plates (like a true douchebag)?

10. G 5POT

We all know women want men who can find the mythical, so-called G-spot. This douchebag not only thinks he’s discovered the secret to unlocking heavenly female pleasure, but thinks the best way to communicate that fact is to parade around with it on his license plate. He thinks: women see his plate and say ‘he must be awesome in bed!’ We know: they see it and think ‘his manhood is smaller than his sense of humor’ (which is non-existent).


What does your number plate say about you? In this case nothing good. The owner of this vehicle is either extremely honest or in possession of an extremely retarded sense of humor. You decide. Furthermore: do not drop your kids off at school if you own this vehicle… unless, that is, you enjoy being strung up from the nearest lamppost by an angry mob from the parent-teacher association.


This douche has taken his mother’s advice to ‘flaunt it if you’ve got it’ to a disgustingly moronic extreme and decided to declare himself as hairy and hard publically. It’s hard to imagine any situation where this license plate would be funny… arriving for dinner with the in-laws? Nope. Returning a book to the library? Don’t think so. Worst of all: every morning he gets up, showers, shaves, dresses, heads out and looks at his car and thinks – ‘I’m a douche’. Tragic.


What is it they say about people who insist on telling you something over and over again? We don’t know… but what we do know is that the more this guy harps on about his love of ‘poontang’, and the more we see this pathetic license plate, the more we are convinced he bats for the other side, or has never dipped his wick at all. Note the irony of this plate being from ‘Virginia’.


Being a screaming homo – and driving around with a number plate declaring that fact – is all well and good on the West Coast, but swap the word ‘California’ for ‘Texas’ on that plate and you’ve got yourself a one-way ticket to gaylord heaven – courtesy of both barrels of a slack-jawed redneck’s shotgun. Ouch.


Sometimes the douchiest number plates are the ones that attempt to poke fun at themselves and fail – in the most retarded way possible. The owner of this vehicle thinks his plate says: ‘I’m so funny and cool, look at my hilarious vanity plate!’ The rest of us simply think: ‘Just remove the ‘LOL’ and you’re spot on my douchebag friend’.


It’s hard to tell whether this idiot genuinely thinks he is being funny, genuinely thinks he is being funny but is dyslexic, or just never went to school. We suspect a combination of all three.


We like to think a hot porn actress owns this vehicle and that she was deemed to be so damn good at her job she won the right to display this number plate by… well, you get the idea. The reality is this plate is on the back of a Chevy pick-up truck owned by a 250 pound body-builder called Brett. And he will f*** you up if you call him gay.

2. A55 (O) RGY

This clever use of the orange on Florida license plates gets 10 points for outstanding stupidity, and 0 points for class and style. There’s something deeply disturbing about putting that much thought and effort into something so lame – just think, if only we could channel the power of all the morons with crap plates we could use it to solve all the world’s problems! No we couldn’t.


Quite simply, bizarre. What exactly this douchebag’s motivations are for ordering this ridiculous license plate we will probably never be able to fully understand. Having said that, we’re not sure we would want to.

Want more plates to laugh at? Get ‘em here.

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39 Responses

  1. DaveMofo says:

    At least none of these plates had a cowboy, AND a space shuttle, AND an oil derrick, AND, AND, AND….WTF Tx?

  2. Dave says:

    I think #4 is supposed to be Ana’s Lex, as in Ana’s Lexus. It’s a slightly humorous and unfortunate oversight, but I don’t think they are a dyslexic trying to be funny.

  3. 68SportFury says:

    Are you sure #2 is a vanity plate? Could just have been the one between A54 RGY and A56 RGY.

  4. Babaylan says:

    Thank God theres no “DIC LA1R” in here or a “OVR 9000″ or worse!

    A “GAY SPRTAN” or else King Leonidas will do one heck of a bloody rampage around here for giving the Spartan army such a bad name… and let me remind you that he will no longer “fight in the shade” because THIS…ISNT…. SPARTAAA!!!!!!!!

  5. Blitzen says:

    I understand the sarcasm heaped at some of those – but VGNA LVR is supposed to be Virginia Lover I think – not what we are interpreting it as….
    Cumgzlr – I have no idea…….
    And another defintion of a G-spot is a hundred grand – which is about what that car costs….

  6. michelle, atlanta says:

    #2 isn’t a vanity plate, I’ve read about it before. It was an accident.

  7. Faust says:

    Wow. “Gay”, “Stupid”, “Moron”, “Idiot”, “Douchebag”, “Retarded”, “Slack-Jawed Redneck” … wow you’ve got a lot of hate and anger inside of you. Seek Therapy.

  8. Jim says:

    The writer of this piece (o.s.) is an idiot who has decided that he knows what’s funny to everyone and what is not. He has also completely destroyed the joys of ‘douche’ and ‘douche bag’ by using them at least five too many times, which makes him a tool. Thanks for a very unfunny article fail, you tool. Call me when your mentality catches up with your age.

  9. Miba says:

    I disagree with numbers 7 and 4. On #7 if you look you see the plate is from Virginia, they clearly are Virginia Lovers, but a better way to do that would have been to take out the dash and put vrgnalvr. And #4 is on a Lexus (which you can see on the plate holder) so clearly this is Ana’s Lexus.

  10. Carnage says:

    Whoever wrote this article is a complete fag. A lot of these plates aren’t even meant to be “funny.” Oh boohoo someone made a plate that offends your sensitive ass? Let’s make a poorly written article of the subject. Go cry some more. :'(

  11. KC says:

    Most of these are pretty funny! DaveMofo – Eat a Dick! WTF does Texas have to do with anything here? Almost all of them are from VA.

  12. YouAintFunnyEither says:

    It seems more like you are reaching…some one these are not really that bad. And some are just coincidences. You seeem to be trying real hard to sound like you’re mad when in fact you’re not. HRYHARD- It could be anything…VGNA LVR seems more like it’s Virginia Lover and not something else. It’s no coincidence that it is FROM Virginia…ANASLEX – You are retarded! This is ANA’S LEXus. You want to sound really pissed off? Go work for FOX Network!!!

  13. Your Name Here says:

    Wow, I’m agreeing with a couple of the posts on here…it appears that you have some anger management issues and you don’t really know how to interpret vanity plates. In addition to the few obvious misinterpretations others have point out, I believe #8 HRYHARD is in reference to commands yelled during a curling match (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glossary_of_curling#H). Curling in California weird? Yes, but I’ve seen a lot stranger come out of that state…

  14. Frankie says:

    I agree with most of the posts…..Taken well out of context. Try to find a real story to write about. And why would yahoo put this as news….. Now that’s a douche bag of a news source!

  15. Allen says:

    DId you get paid to write this?

  16. jenn says:

    It’s hard to tell whether Julian (the so called author of this crap) genuinely thinks he is being funny, genuinely thinks he is being funny but is stupid, or just never went to school. I suspect a combination of all three.

    ANASLEX is obviously ANA’S LEX. Only a real douche would think anything else.

    And what’s with all the anger? Living in your mothers basement has obviously turned you sour.

  17. Greg says:

    Maybe the writer is unaware that the spanish word for FART is PEDO. The plate is saying “Old Fart”, not pedophile…… really reaching there. And, being from Texas, where for decades the plate had nothing at all on it, the newer plates are a refreshing change.

  18. Alex says:

    HRYHARD is a curling term. I realize it’s a California plate, but it’s entirely possible the owner is a curler (Hurry Hard is yelled out by the skip to indicate to his team to sweep hard)

  19. Seriously? says:

    Ummmm, I think you all are missing the point. OBVIOUSLY some of these arent vanity plates, and some of the ones that are, dont mean what they look like they mean. IT’S A JOKE! Good lord, you people are half-wits.

  20. 'Seyi Adeniyi-Omoakin says:

    I absolutely agree with all previous posts. This article should be tagged Douche Article of the Week. All in favour say “Aye!” Please give this wanna-be columnist – or… whatchamacallit – a chance. I also agree that he needs therapy, not psyche drugs! He needs Dianetics therapy!

  21. Ree says:

    Come on, people, cut the guy some slack.

    A few of those ARE really really ridiculous. How many people in MINNESOTA do you think are aware that pedo means fart? I’ve taken spanish and didn’t learn that word.

    “Curling term”. How many people would be familiar with a CURLING term? There’s a good many of us still trying to figure out what curling is.

    And there are a lot of places in this country (not just Texas) where GAY BOI might find himself getting beaten to death.

    Apart from that, the tags seem more disturbing than funny. If you’re a CUM GZLR or into BUKKAKE, the rest of society doesn’t need to know.

  22. Pat says:

    Hey Alex, we aren’t half-wits…UR!!!!! Yea, we know the plates aren’t all what they seem to be but the author of this piece does! And it is his interpretations that we are bagging on! get a life! You got that same idiot mentality that he does! And I find it hard to beleive that the Alberta DMV would allow BUKAKKAKE to be issued! In CA, they are strict and do not allow obscene plates. They ask you to submit 1 choice and 2 alternatives when you apply.

  23. Bill Brasky says:

    I don’t think the people that own these vanity plates are the dumb ones.. I think the author of this article might be.

    So, the author has some weird hang up with vanity plates.. so.. what is it? did someone with vanity plates run over your cat or something?

    Sympathies to your cat Mittens, but don’t let your past get in the way of your sense of humor, smile once in a while.. Mittens is in a better place now.

  24. john says:

    While I don’t completely buy into the idea of vanity plates, they do generate revenue for cities and states, and allow creative, free expression. But the person that wrote the text for this article clearly has an anger problem. So, if they are reading this, consider some therapy, please.

  25. HELLO says:


  26. HELLO says:


  27. Davis says:

    Rage much? You need some anger management classes ASAP, Julian.

  28. Jack says:

    You have a very dirty mind Julian, is that why you’re so angry, because you can’t get laid?

    One tag is obviously stating: “Virginia Lover”, & another says: “Ana’s Lexus”. The only sexual connotations are in your dirty little mind, because you can’t get laid, so that’s all you think about.

  29. Rob C. says:

    The only thing more lame than these plates are your comments about them.

  30. Jerry says:

    Yeah, sorry, #2 was an oversight by the Florida DMV, not an intentional attempt at deviant humour.

  31. James says:

    You’re also forgetting the tourism slogan, “Virginia is for lovers”.

  32. Ricky says:

    I think the writer is a dumbass. Clearly, “ANASLEX” is neither someone with dyslexia or some other issue. The plate is on a Lexus – therefore quite clearly this is Ana’s Lexus!!! FAIL by the writer.

  33. Tom says:

    I think the writer of this article is an IDIOT and needs to get out and find a real job….maybe in the fast food industry….would you like to add fries to that order shouldn’t be too hard for them to remember. WHAT A MORON..

  34. Tom says:

    tTW….to the writer of this article….I don’t blame you for not putting your name on the article you wrote. You’ve saved your parents a bunch of embarrassment…

  35. Tyler Durden says:

    “ANASLEX” When taken in conjunction with the Lexus emblem…only a moron would think that the owner of this vehicle means anything more than “Anna’s Lexus.”

    This Julian is a bigger douche than any of the custom plate owning people he’s complaining about.

  36. DaveMofo says:

    Hey, KC? I live in TX and wish our older white plates with blue lettering and ‘Texas’ and red was still our design. Nothing is worse than throwing around some archetypes and making most of the people here drive around with that crap on their car. Anyway, I’ve already eaten some dick today, I had it with a nice chianti. Thanks, anyway.

  37. James says:

    Ive seen the #1 plate cruising around in Calgary, last I heard it was revoked by the registry.

  38. Jake says:

    Half of these are just ridiculous… But I like that one- LOL FAIL. Priceless.